You Did It

I wrote you 3 days ago and in it I talked about lifes struggles, getting ahead and in the end it doesn’t even matter what you had. So why struggle your whole life to gain, gain, gain. I’d like to add to that. Not only achieving to gain wealth, prosperity but what about your reputation. Why care about what people think about you. Case in point; just today I talked to your "friend", -----, somehow we get on the subject of your past and people not being able to realize people change. One guy had commented to --- that you were just a piece of shit. I’m sorry honey, I’m sorry that people are so naive that they can’t see that people are young and that people make mistakes and all people change.
Ya know some people are all too willing to tell me how crappy your past was and that you weren’t perfect and you fucked up and you did this bad thing and that bad thing. Well, honey, these so called bad things I heard weren’t bad to me at all. They were things that all of us have done in one form or another in our younger days, in our stupid days. I’ve done extremely stupid things in my past as you well know, but my past does not define me. As with you. You know I’m so non-judgemental. I try to take people for what they are. Accept them for their good and bad. To see the good in all people. Anyway, honey I fell in love with you, your goods and your faults. Although in my mind you had no faults. Sure you did some things in your past, but that’s just what it was, your past. Why do people bring it up (----). Who cares, I really don’t care what you did in your past. The ---- I loved for the past 3 years was the ---- I loved. Not --- from 10 years ago, 15 years ago, 20 years ago. Everyone who knew you during that time said you had changed so much. The transformation was amazing. Well, I never got to see this transformation. I saw the transformed. And the transformed was the most amazing man I’ve ever met. You were absolutely amazing. Honey, if you weren’t proud of yourself for the changes you made, you should be. I don’t know where you came from or how far you came. I can get an idea from all you’ve told me, from just seeing who you were married to, from comments (good and bad) from people. I can start to see that yes, you did come a long way. I am proud of you. I am sooo proud of you. I’ve said this before. You did it. Whatever it takes to fulfill your purpose on this earth (in God’s eyes). You did it! I wish I knew what all you did. I can reflect on you. Study you and I know how you were and what you did, but you were so perfect. Isn’t it amazing, I was with the perfect man. God perfected you and when he was done, he took you. You had an uncanny ability to attract people. You were so open to all people, you were so nice to all people. You attracted people. People liked you. Everyone who met you liked you. You NEVER talked bad about people. Even people who did a lot of bad things. You rolled with the punches, you never complained. You just shut your mouth and worked so hard. You really tried to make everyone in your life happy. You wanted those around you to be happy. You were such a great provider for me, --- and ---. You wanted the best for us all and you tried your hardest. I’ve gotten off on many tangents, but the point I wanted to make was, you can change so much and be the best person in the world and there are people out there that will never change their opinion of you. They have labeled you. In your case, you’ve always just been a piece of shit, according to this particular guy. What hurts me is that this person has made an awful mistake. If they only knew the ---- I knew, not the ----- of years ago. I’m sorry honey that some people still think that. I know it doesn’t effect you now and you probably don’t care. It just goes to show that you can work and work so hard to become this successful person. You can strive to be the best. The best father, the best husband, the best person, the best pilot, the best provider and you can still be nothing to people. So it proves to me something I’ve held true for a long time. You will never please everybody, so why strive to make others happy. Why strive to be this or that. Why do things to prove others wrong (or right). I learned that years back and people can call me selfish, but when I make decisions now I think of only me. What do I want? What will make me happy? I don’t make decisions anymore based on other people. This just affirms that. You worked so hard. So, so hard and you did it. You became someone so perfect, you would have amazed all those people who knew you. Those who were blind to what you have become….screw them. It’s their loss for never getting the opportunity to know such a beautiful soul. Honey, I thank you for showing me the way to perfection. Thank you for showing me how to live a rightful life. Believe me I watched and I took notes. I hope to be not far behind you. I admire you, your strength and your beauty. I can’t believe how lucky I was to have been touched by you. Thanks for sharing part of your life with me. I love you honey. You are beautiful. Love you always and forever, your baby girl. xoxoxooxox