Spring

Spring is full of memories of us. Lately I have been having all sorts of memories of us pop into my head. I mowed the yard yesterday, usually after I mow the yard I get the bbq ready and start marinating the chicken for our dinner. Instead of bbq marinated chicken with you I ate toast all by myself. I keep thinking I should be driving up to CDA on the weekends or you should be pulling in my driveway. Or laying on my couch after I come back from my morning run. Or especially after mowing the yard I would always come in the house and there would be a message from you..."hi honey, just calling to say how much i love you and how beautiful you are" There was always a message. And when I came in the house yesterday, there was none. It's so hard to not expect things to be the same. It's hard to accept this new way of life. It's hard to let go and realize it will just never be like that again. Ugh, I don't really want to think or type about that. I mainly wanted you to know I thought about you pretty much the whole time I mowed the yard yesterday and I missed not eating dinner with you or at minimum a message from you on my answering machine. I love you honey and I'll be with you again someday (soon I hope). Love you, luv u, luv u, luv u, luv u, luv u!!! Forever and ever. I'm yours for all eternity. Til we meet again, your baby girl oxoxoxo